You know you are tough when...

1. You come home with your ear ripped to shreds
2. You make your owner curse at you.
3. You get to pick where you sleep in the house and everyone moves out of your way.
4. No one can tell you when to take a bath.
5. You can lick between your toes.
6. You growl at the reflection of yourself in the mirror.

Happy Birthday Me!

How to assemble children's furniture

1. Make sure your helper doesn't have a fever or you will have all the pre-drilled holes in the wrong spots.
2. Find instructions in your native tongue and don't attempt to decipher foreign languages while building.
3. The picture of the finished product is how its supposed to look, its not an interpretive drawing.
4. If you have extra parts left over, you messed up.
5. If you break something don't try and hide it from your helper.
6. When you see your helper screwing in the door knob on the mini-kitchen in the wrong place the second time in a row, send him off with a loud, " Ok, thats enough for you".
7. When the cats are chasing the packing material all over the house and the baby is crying, you are done for the night.

Well, husband is still really sick. We went and saw specialists last week. Won't be posting often until he's feeling better. Seems like there is 9 million more things I have to get done during the day, with him home all day now. :(

The power of shame.

I successfully shamed srjc into providing me a proper place to pump milk. Yay me! Who says institutions can't be shamed?!

Dainty dewy petals

The sick and over worked

This last week has been difficult for me. I can find no time to study, husband is extremely ill, and baby is teething again. Every time I sit down to try and crack a book open my eyes flicker shut.

Latin Word Winner!

In mere minutes Princess haiku has cracked the case. While in their beds far across the sea the librarians and artists will be gnashing their teeth in woe, PH has declared herself a winner!
idio- means: self, distinct, separate.

Latin Word of the day

A while back I started the guess the latin word contest. I am guilty of stealing the concept from Occy at the book collectors coliseum. So once again, no cheating, googling or asking a librarian...

idio-

means exactly what?

What I keep in my purse MEME

I have loose change.
A lolly pop stick with no lolly left to it.
Pictures of baby in various poses.
Receipts for bird seed and apples.
Phone number of in-law I keep meaning to call.
3 tubes of Chapstick, in case I lose one.
A business card for a MAC tools supplier (great tools)
My extremely fancy wallet.
3 pens.

Whats normally also in my purse:
2 crumpled up diapers
baby wipes
baby clothes
29 baby toys
Hyland's homeopathic teething tablets
junk food
prybar
to do list
car keys
1 lone flip flop
toothbrush
wrench
can of emergency soda pop


I nominate Princess Haiku, Shaz and lastly Lebbercherrie to divulge the secrets of his man-purse.

Some of The Bells...

...
Hear the tolling of the bells -
Iron bells!
What a world of solemn thought their monody compels!
In the silence of the night,
How we shiver with affright
At the melancholy menace of their tone!
For every sound that floats
From the rust within their throats
Is a groan.
And the people - ah, the people -
They that dwell up in the steeple,
All alone,
And who, tolling, tolling, tolling,
In that muffled monotone,
Feel a glory in so rolling
On the human heart a stone -
They are neither man nor woman -
They are neither brute nor human -
They are Ghouls: -
And their king it is who tolls: -
And he rolls, rolls, rolls,
Rolls
A paean from the bells!
And his merry bosom swells
With the paean of the bells!
And he dances, and he yells;
Keeping time, time, time,
In a sort of Runic rhyme,
To the paean of the bells: -
Of the bells:
Keeping time, time, time
In a sort of Runic rhyme,
To the throbbing of the bells -
Of the bells, bells, bells: -
To the sobbing of the bells: -
Keeping time, time, time,
As he knells, knells, knells,
In a happy Runic rhyme,
To the rolling of the bells -
Of the bells, bells, bells -
To the tolling of the bells -
Of the bells, bells, bells, bells,
Bells, bells, bells, -
To the moaning and the groaning of the bells.

I have always wondered what fury and disharmony brought together this poem. Do you think anyone interrupted him with asinine questions such as, "Honey, where is my beige whale bone corset?"

Best adjective to describe this person?

Latin Word of the day

Here's a tough one. No Googling or cheating...
What do you think this means?

vermi-

Win the challenge and be famous for a day!

A full moon over the superstructure

I worked all night on August eleventh 2005; the last pier-footing was poured full of concrete in a long span of around 30 hours. I wasn't used to the hours, and six pm to six am is difficult until you've done it for several days in a row. I like the money though; time and a half all night. I parked my truck in the dusty parking lot and walked down to the dock around 5:30. The sun was still up, but was headed down and getting ready for twilight.

It was almost time to catch the crew boat out onto the water. The low light was interesting, long shadows from the old train bridge next to the new Benecia Bridge, stretched out over the water. I hung over the edge of the boat to see the shadows that bumped along with the waves. City lights from Benecia and smaller towns along the Solano Bay, flickered on and off from afar. Slow traffic on the old George Miller bridge traveled across the skyway.
It's softer and mellower at night.
Everyone knows that it will be a long time before the sun circles around the Earth to the other side of the horizon. In the middle of the night it can feel like the sun has been down for a week.

In celebration of poor planning...

Our honorary winner is Santa Rosa Junior College, with whom I spoke with on Tuesday. (Booo, Hisssss)
I ask the college counselor, "What do you have set up for women who are breast feeding and need to pump on campus?" I receive a pause and a polite, "Hold on, I'll see.." I need to interject at this point that I am thoroughly shocked at the lack of accommodation and foresight exhibited by this brand new facility in Petaluma, Ca. Is it so surprising that I don't think a bathroom is adequate!? There isn't even a chair or an electrical outlet or anything. There are all these germs from people who don't wash their hands before/after they use the toilet- we are talking about my infant's food supply after all. I don't think this is entertaining in the least.
So anyway, the counselor comes back and says there is nowhere available. Her suggestion? Use my car; put up some shades and pump in my car. Please, it will be close to 100 degrees in the summer. I will still be the crazy naked lady in the car. I mean really. Do they think that is a solution? Are all the office rooms full on that campus? There is no cubicle with a couch, or measly chair that is private? I could tell this woman was embarrassed when I asked her if she realized how many times I would have to be out in my car. Thats alot of missed time from classes, but what is my option? In order to maintain your milk supply you need to pump as often as every two hours and no longer than 5 hours. The lady suggested I pump the day before and save the milk, I had to explain the whole supply and demand thing to her. Anyway, aren't they supposed to give guidance on classes and not breast milk pumping? If I had listened to her advice I would have wrecked my milk supply. She didn't realize she was talking to a lactovist. :)I will be directing my tirade at the Dean soon.

A mouse! Just what I wanted.

Everyone likes a new pair of socks!

Wordless Wednesday

Mmmm that feels good!

Get this kitten off me! Aah!

The effects of naps on the infant brain.

"Morning naps tend to be rich in the type of sleep which has proven to play an important role in brain maturation. Afternoon naps tend to be important in reducing levels of cortisol, the hormone linked with stress." Excerpt from, sleep solutions for your baby, toddler and preschooler, written by Ann Douglas.
I appreciate the thoroughness of Ms. Douglas's research. Maybe I will make a fan site for her. In particular I am enjoying the 'no-crying' solutions of this book.

Attention treckies!

Do you have dreams of William Shatner in tight polyester pants? Can you recite all the catch phrases that endear you to women in line at the grocery store? " Dammit Jim!" or perhaps, " Beam me up Scotty". Do you own star trek toys; are you over the age of 25? Well guess what!? The 2007 Star Trek Convention is coming soon! Go here for all the guest appearances...

Guess the name of this crane.

I'm not joking! It really has it's own personal name. (The one on the left side.) Its a floating Derrick crane.

Indelible Visions

I have traveled a vast and eerie landscape over the last ten years. I have seen the jaundiced orb of the moon, transverse the inky night sky; leaping over the piers of the bridge during night shift. I have seen thousands of twinkling lights vibrating from the coastline of the city. I have seen the insides of radioactive hoppers, powdery stalactites hanging suspended from the ceiling in silence. I have crawled on my belly in the muddy marsh under the steam lines in Oil Refineries. Ah, the places I have been...

The Telling, by Ursula k. Le Guin

I Just finished this small book of 231 riveting pages. As usual, Ms. Le Guin's social commentary is rich and deeply woven into her tale. Her previous books have won much critical acclaim, and I am a huge fan of hers. The story begins on earth, where a religious group is taking control of the government and is outlawing freedom of expression. We travel to a new planet where earth is attempting to share information with a world that has outlawed reading and writing. It is a frightening look into what the loss of history entails.

Improper tool uses.

1. Never pick your teeth with an awl.
2. Despite what your coworkers say, dry line chalk tastes really bad. When it is breezy try and work up wind if you are snapping lines.
3. Never, never, never hold 16 penny sinkers ( the green lubricated ones) in your mouth. I hope I don't need to elaborate what can go wrong.
4. Don't tell your buddy a funny joke when he's working with a nail gun.
5. You are not helping anyone when you have an old tape measure and the hook/tip can be jiggled a quarter of an inch. You will get yelled at. They will throw it off the barge.
6. Try to remember to unbuckle your tools before you go into the office, you will knock the plants off the secretary's desk.

Carpenter trick #1

When you need to make multiple rips of plywood and you are by your self.

Measure and mark both sides of the plywood. Cut notches on your marks on one end with your Skilsaw. Slip the knot of your chalk line into the groove and snap your lines. This prevents the chalk line from slipping off the mark as you walk the 8 feet to the end of the sheet. (Always happens, and drives me nuts) Cut your rips perfectly every time, impress them with your finesse.

Help from the hand of Dog.

Cheating is a bad idea. The entire idea of a placement test is that you get put into the correct class. I must once again bring this topic up I am afraid. I called in to see how I did on the test ( note previous post), and was amazed and chagrined that I had placed in finite math. Yes, math 9, mathematics for math/chemistry majors! Vanishingword is now wringing her hands in dismay. I should not have filled in all those questions without knowing them. Apparently the hand of Dog was guiding my bubble filling.
*sigh*

Princess Haiku is our LWD winner!

We have a winner! Please congratulate our newest brain...
tachy- means swift or rapid.

Today's Latin word

Think you have a handle on language? Tell us what this means without googling it. No cheating.

tachy-

Help make a quilt of good wishes for an adopted baby!

I was running through random blogs and found this little project blog. People are sending fabric from all sorts of places! Here is a quote from the blog,
"... Write or type a wish/poem/ on acid free paper (preservation purposes) expressing your good wishes and heartfelt sentiments for the baby; The fabric will be used to make the quilt and the notes and the smaller pieces of fabric will be placed in a books for each of our daughters to be given when they are older."
Go here to see what its about!

Free psychic questions answered!

It seems that people have forgotten about our resident psychic. She wanted to post, so I said she could.
"I madam Jewel, am prepared to answer your questions. I will use my amazing powers to see into the future and into the deep dark indelible recesses of your heart. Ask your questions...."

I collect rocks! Does this make me a nerd? I have rocks from 150 meters down into the bedrock, where they anchored the piles of the new Bay Bridge.

least used items this week!

1. Soap
2. Shower stall
3. Hairbrush
4. Vacuum
5. Notes on molecular biology of comparative embryonic studies
6. Algebra brush up book
7. Pillow
8. Bed
9. The part of my brain that allows sleep ( all these are related to the baby if you didn't guess)
10. Turn signal in car, see number 9.

How to embarass yourself in college.

I went to go take a math placement exam today. It has only been 16 years since I last took Intermediate Algebra, I thought the memories might still be viable. But no. No, they are not. We had two minutes to look over the exam, and change to a harder or easier one. I had the folder of questions, and none of them looked familiar. In truth they looked like some sort of Chinese writing once I started having heart palpitations and my vision squeezed in. I could have changed out my test. My pride prevented me from rising from my chair and declaring in a loud voice that I needed Elementary Algebra. I think most of the problem was that there was a 72 year old woman in the class room and we had a long discussion before the class. She told me how she was reciting a mantra, "I will be able to answer the problems, the answer is in my subconscious (repeat)". Somehow I thought this was applicable to me as well. It wasn't. It wasn't even close. After 35 minutes, I started just guess and not even looking at the equations. If I get into Intermediate Algebra it will be because of an act of god.
Here is a picture of a Fractual Geometric math problem. Mandelbrot set. Bifurcation diagram. Just in case you would like to feel sorry for me.

Rumble in the Bronx, a tail of cats.

This morning there was a suprise visitor in the backyard; a marmalade tom cat. The tribe wasn't pleased. Weenie my enormous, sumo wrestler of a cat was doing the ambulance noises so loud at the sliding glass door, he woke up the baby. The "girls" looked mad, and darted out the door after him. My husband says, " Oh look, a kitty, he looks hungry. I'll put out some crunchies for him", I was thinking that something bad was going to happen and I was right. Husband comes back in and says, "Cupcake and that cat are friends, they ran off together!" Sure, and I'm a ten foot fluffy rabbit! Not five minutes after husband took off for work and I hear a huge cat fight out in the front yard. I open the door and in swaggers Cupcake. I do believe she kicked the stuffing of one orange cat. Now to deal with the cat food outside; its asking for problems. Nice that husband has a kind heart though.

Holy Mackerel, this thing makes noise and has lights

More wordless wednsday...

Some of my vanishing artwork.

Cupcake the villianous dispatcher of mice.

Are you frightened yet?

Wordless Wednsday

Just wanted to explain the peculiar posting for Wed, on a Tuesday! My friends over sea happen to be on a 9 hour earlier schedule than I.

Guess the book I'm reading competition!

Go to Occam's Library and guess the book. I am totally stumped folks.

Seven Random Things About Me.

1. I have a cryptic sense of humor that can go entirely unrecognized by people who don't know me.
2. I have extremely robust and long, toes. They are like prehensile digits. I could peel an apple with them.
3. Before I had a baby I thought people were over zealous about every little thing their child did.
4. I make double batches of oatmeal chocolate chip cookies and freeze the dough. I eat it secretly late at night while I blog.
5. I love my husband, even when he tries to hide the cookie dough.
6. I am working on a book, but have been suffering from writers block for over a year.
7. When driving I am consumed with the desire to run the cars that cut me off, into the ditch on the side of the highway.

Addendum:
So thanks to our friend, Us Danes, I got tagged with a meme called seven random things about me. I am now tagging Lebbercherrie and Two Mittens . We await with bated breath...

I am a killer.

I have killed, and I will kill again.

A picture of my unwary victim.
Did you know that only adult female mosquitoes bite? I was baffled to learn that female mosquitoes need the protein in the blood to produce eggs. The rather harmless male, sips nectar from flowers and plants. The females, do this as well, but it is their quest for blood that makes them a pest. And get this, not all species of mosquitoes bite humans - some species prefer birds, large mammals, or even snakes!
A bug that bites a snake, now thats entertaining. How do you suppose a snake itches its self?
Just a thought...

Latin Word of the day

Have an Idea what this means?

-genic

Go ahead and post it, no cheating! You could be famous for a day if you win!

Lebbercherrie is our winner!

We would like to formally congratulate our resident brain for his outrageous win! We have a latin Word Winner folks!

Arthr- means joint! As in Arthritis. (joint-inflammation)

Well Done!

More bad poetry

I am compelled to describe the temperature here in the Bay Area over the weekend.

Blistering burning boiling hot,
Your plants are all withering,
Better water all, still in a pot.
Resist the urge to start blithering,
There is nothing you can do
90 degrees in May, it can't be true!

You get the point.
I dislike rhymes, I realize its exceptionally bad, but its my first attempt since grade school and that was eons ago.

New findings on the cause of SIDS!

This link to a ground breaking article written in England was given to me by a friend. Sudden Infant Death Syndrome is horrible, and this article deserves reading. I guess the main thing it says to me is that breastfeeding your baby every 1 -1/2 to 3 hours at night is best way to keep your baby's glucose levels up. The babies that are left to sleep the night are in the gravest danger.

I just read something that made me laugh!

Are you part of the cult?

You could be, according to Peggy Robin, in the most controversial part of her book Bottlefeeding Without Guilt (new title: When Breastfeeding is Not an Option). If you believe her, there is a militant breastfeeding cult on the loose in our nation!

I took many of the supposed elements of the "breastfeeding cult lifestyle" and put them in the form of questions. Ask yourself if you are caught up in the "breastfeeding cult":

1. Do you nurse your babies past one year of age?
2. Do you share your bed with your nursing baby?
3. Do you believe that mothers and fathers have different roles to play in raising children?
4. Do you believe that women were provided with breasts in order to feed their babies?
5. Do you associate with other women who breastfeed their children or even---gasp!---attend La Leche League meetings?
6. Do you sign your email messages with "Billy's mommy" or cutesy nicknames? This is an obvious sign that you are assuming a childlike, unquestioning, unintellectual role within the cult.
7. Do you follow the AAP guidelines of breastfeeding a baby exclusively for six months before introducing supplements or solids? (Presumably the AAP is part of the cult.)
8. Do you believe that there are not only physical differences between men and women, but psychological and emotional differences as well?
9. Do you believe that motherhood is a noble calling and that mothers and babies belong together? Do you---gasp!---think that babies are better off if their mothers are home with them rather than pursuing careers? ( I do understand this isn't always possible)
   
10. Do you make your baby's food from wholesome, nourishing ingredients and avoid processed foods or additives?
11. Do you believe that birth should be a joyous, natural, and (when possible) non medical event?
12. Do you use cloth diapers?
13. Do you prefer cotton clothing?
14. Do you avoid pacifiers and artificial nipples?

If you answered in the affirmative to any of these, let me warn you that Peggy Robin views these as characteristics of the cult lifestyle!

Today's Latin word

Think you know what this means? No google cheating.

arthr-

Go ahead and let us know what you think. You may win the competition and be famous for a day!

Lactation Consultant

I am guessing you may not know what this is. A Lactation educator takes lots of classes to keep updated on the latest studies, and specializes in the breastfeeding mother. This my friends, is what I am going back to school for.
A college degree is actually not required, but then the requirements for work experience in order to get licensed are 6500 hours! With a four year degree it's only 2500 hours. So I'm going back for a nursing degree, god willing. I figure with a nursing degree I can work more places.
A far cry from carpentry you are probably thinking, and you are completely correct!

Gone will be the thundering clap of the pile driving hammer.
The piston exploding through rock, will be replaced by gentle correction and patience.

Thousands of tons of concrete splashing into place with a pump will be replaced with a new mother and her child; worlds apart.

Houston, we have a tooth!

By golly, a tooth today! Our very first one!

First food!

On love...

The Miller's Daughter

It is the miller's daughter,
And she is grown so dear, so dear,
That I would be the jewel
That trembles in her ear:
For hid in ringlets day and night,
I'd touch her neck so warm and white.

And I would be the girdle
About her dainty dainty waist,
And her heart would beat against me,
In sorrow and in rest:
And I should know if it beat right,
I'd clasp it round so close and tight.

And I would be the necklace,
And all day long to fall and rise
Upon her balmy bosom,
With her laughter or her sighs:
And I would lie so light, so light,
I scarce should be unclasp'd at night.

by Alfred lord Tennyson

Two mittens is our latin word winner!

We extend the honor of famous for a day to Two mittens who guessed correctly.
ecto- means: outside, outer, external. Way to go!

Today's Latin word

Think you know what ecto- means?

Post your answer here and become famous for one day! No Google-cheating. All guesses welcome.

I am a lion

How my cats get grandiose ideas about their self importance.

Apperently breastfeeding is disgusting!

It is not, but this guy thinks so! I was reading this today and I couldn't believe how conservative and absurd it was. I have to say just in case your not aware, that public breastfeeding is protected by law in the united states. I don't think you should need to go into a public bathroom to feed your child. Would you take a meal there? Probably not. As far as exposure goes, most of the time its not even that obvious. No one has ever said anything to me about it. This guy is a creep, and he's mean. Post him about it!

Zimbob is correct!

We have a Latin word winner!

Today's Latin word

-pnea

Think you know what it stands for? Go ahead, submit your answer. No Google-cheating.

Never wake a sleeping mother

This morning at 5 am when I and the baby are finally asleep:
Clattering in the kitchen, then, "Honey where are the sodas?" Me, "RAWR". Sounds of wallpaper shredding and books tumbling off shelf.

Poison

Two snakes were sitting there. One snake asks the other, "Are we poisonous?" The other snakes says, "No. Why?" The first snake says, "Because I just bit my tongue!"

Megan's Law

If you live in the United States there is a government website that lists all the child molesters and creeps! I was checking around my own neighborhood, just to see and was totally scared out of my mind. Its really an interesting site, it lists their address as well as gives you their picture and crime. You scroll down to the bottom of the page and it links you to a search engine. You can search by zip code, address, county or name. I was thinking I ought to run some of my ex boyfriends through. Here is the link...
Remember Megan.

More on the tale of a cat scorned

As well as general mockery, beware of insulting your cats dignity. You will pay.

I am going to have to change my tag!

I will become Carpentergirl's tricks to surviving college with twenty year olds. How to get a better grade than blonds in half shirts and short shorts. Ten ways to convince your teacher that you really DO have to go home and take the baby to the doctors. Yes, the baby really did eat my homework.